emails

am i a pocessive person or what?? i'm prying into his personal information. His emails, should i feel comforted that my pam is doing it? should i?

and what did the dream tell me? it's real and scary.. hilted me,ditched me, i;m very self centred. today i found out about myself and i can jsut be so excited making people speak of my good points. itay is my guy, my man, i wanna marry him . but he is young. what if he regrets? what if he wants to try out later in his life? that's why i should not force him. i should not be impatient. that's not so that i should search around, as that's not making me feel good that there's people out there/. i should not flirt arounf. rather, give him signals that i am happy with him, like him much and all...