HELLO THERE

HELLO THERE
i get intimidated by writing this
seems like someone i know would chance upon this

Even when i am at home writing on my journal
A great sense of possibility that my feelings might be exposed

Well.

i feel what i speak does not make any sense.
i mumble too

Either i do not speak my mind

or

my mind is in a riot

without consideration

it does not make sense to people at all..

there is so much i want to do

painting, arts, acting, does it give me a sense of fulfillment?
a stir of excitement when i see good works

tay mentioned, it gives him an orgasm,, tay we are so similar but writing this down hurts. i am so unsure of the fututre, and always putting these thoughts aside.
they confront me during the day

I lie, don't I? On how we can still be together...

When i graduate.
Starting to work, i will be busy and may not find time to go down and see him.

u think? He would be doing his work and all. ahh. there are times times i don't know If i want to let it go, just to prevent hurt in the future. i want to just end it, as there is little possibility.

Also, I do think he is like me.

If he is like me, then it means laziness and that means he might not come,
no motivation no confidence. ahhh.. i want to see this work at least. we try... know we are trying now. and if it doesn't happen. it is at least we tired. sigh.. how to lvoe someone so much and yet not see each other. god must be playing tricks on us.

loving him yet we can't be together. the stuggles of getting closer. stop being os pessimistic and cheer up about the future.

we have to open up to more opportunities, am i using this toavoid the issue of opeing up??