Ok. Factors that made msging less.

Ok. factors that made msging less.

he can't answer use the internet very much.


he is sick.


he has his exams to study.


he doesn't have feel good being home.

he misses me.


Doesn't these all lead to callin me more???

He

He doesn't call anymore
He stops praising me

It used to be when i msg
he'll almost immediately return the sms.

He stops saying i love yous
More recently, he hasn't replied to my msgs

If i'm away, he'll miss me.
and leave me an email or text.
he'll try till i think he's a little paranoid.

Right now
Morning greetings are just morn greetings.
I sense he's bored.

he left, with me tearing.
i felt like i was the one loving him more.
it didn't feel right. i had to love him more.

nothing about the photos we took.
nothing about wanting me.

only about him having a bad time.
only about his family.

we took great photos.
but he said i looked like a grandma.

awaiting, anticipation is high.


for your call...


when i said i couldn't call nor msg yest,
he didn't reply.

last nite, over msn,
while i was away, he just typed a lo?.
i was in the shower.
Did it take long?
he didn't wait. even thou we couldn't talked on phone last nite.

this afternoon,
i saw him came online briefly,
but upon checkin him a few mins later,
he's offline.
he could be wanting no interruption.

just now
i msegd him i've got my fone.
asked him how's things and said i missed him.

he hasn''t replied..

it usually takes half a min for him to msg
however, it's an hour ago..

we haven't communicate since yest aft.
yet he seems ok with it.
i'm afraid he's bored, worse, finding me bothersome.

I've opened up alot to you in sg.
my fears, my love for you.
my insaneness.
i wasn't shy, unlike what you said.

Yet, when my sis talked about you coming down in future,
you seemed like u didn't want to talk abt it.
you replied." i have to pass this year first, im still young."

after you left.

you told me you felt sad for me, but assured me you are "ok".
you told me you feel bad about how things were, and that thou we will not be married, that u still love me.

i felt a sharp pain and was unable to express my emotions
when you brought up the subject.
i still feel insecure abt those words.

maybe cuz i brought up negativeness abt our future.
but only because i wanted assurances from your words.

u gave me vague msgs to ponder.

at last, you affirmed to me we were to have a sad ending.

how am i to feel..

this long distance r/nship
i want it to last
not for fairytale dreams
but because i love you.

i feel sad
i tear when you aren't responding.

and it's cause i've missed you.

ifs. the ?

today i'll try to write about my feelings
what do i feel trapped between my fears and my love

somehow i want to be there for him

but i don't know how too

should i call him daily and ask him how he is

should i text him and say i miss you

should i tell you my fears of us ?

what if u get turned off?

what if u lose interest?

what ifss.

several what ifs.

must i love u ?
can u tell me

have i hurt you?

am i nonchalent?

Is my behaviour unneccessary?

will i? shall i?

i miss u.


come here.

love me once more.

call me.

kiss me.

and miss me.

i think of you often, you've come into my life. made it brighter, better. your voice your texts
it soothes i must have fallen for you.

now it seems u leave a trace in my room
your scent it lingers on

till the day you come
till the day you love me
i miss you.

when i'm down here
i have forgotten what i've to say..

is it wrong?
for me to bring a man home?

it's too early to familiarize him to my family

this is nutz....

my family
he has seen me all

reading all this rules book

makes me paranoid

loving me less

gettin used to it